Not sorry…

Do you ever find yourself in one of those ecstatic moods…?

You may be a little wired from lack of sleep or something exciting brewing…

My mum would tell me when I would get overtired as a child I would run circles around her legs yelling the theme song to Sesame Street. 

These days I just get really random and unleash my inner silliness…

Last night I was cooking up some bacon with my husband for our midnight feast breakfast burritos and the bacon started spitting up at me… 

“Bacon! I quell you with this flooding of eggs!” I declared, cackling as I poured the beaten eggs over the bacon… 

My husband is still after 12 years together finding himself astounded by how strange and random I can get… 

“I’m sorry I’m so random and awkward…” I say automatically…

He says nothing and just laughs shrugging it off to let me know it’s no bother to him, I think he even enjoys it. 

I catch myself in my apology… I’m sick of apologizing for taking up space… for being my individual unique self. I know I don’t need to anymore…

It’s a conditioning I can let go of...

“Actually I take it back, I’m not…” My mood switched as fast as it does from playful to adamant…

He stops and looks at me, confused… “not awkward?”

“No… I’m fully claiming that… I meant I’m not sorry… in fact my random awkwardness is one of my favourite features of myself...”

We both nod approvingly and move on maneuvering fluidly around each other in our tiny kitchen on our Friday date night at home… 

Making midnight feast breakfast burritos while watching ghost adventures.